Putting your relationship with your spouse first is a smart investment in your marriage. Date nights keep it fun.
I need time away from the kids to recharge and remember those carefree days I had BC (Before Children). I know many couples who have been married for 15 years or more. Some say their secret is putting each other first. A former pastor shared how he and his wife faithfully spent time away from their five children for weekly date nights, monthly weekends away, and quarterly vacations. If they can do it with five children (who were all under 15), that should be an encouragement to the rest of us.
Put it on Your Calendar
Whether you have lots of evening responsibilities or need to arrange for childcare, it’s very important to put date nights on your calendar. They should be treated with the same importance as a doctor’s appointment, parent teacher conference, or spa treatment. When it’s on your calendar it means that you have committed to it and you’re more likely to stick to it. Whatever you have to do, make it regular.
Set the Bar Really Low
I believe the easiest way to make date night a complete failure is to have extremely high or romanticized expectations of what the night will be. No elaborate dinners, no conversations about the kids, and no expectations. That’s it. If your only expectation is to spend time together, away from your children, to reconnect, you will meet that goal every time.
Put It In Your Budget
In addition to scheduling the time and having realistic expectations, it is also important to put it in your budget. Whether your budget allows for a nice steak house dinner or a simple cup of coffee, as long as it happens, it’s okay. Putting this line item in your budget also indicates your seriousness and commitment to making this happen. If you have a challenge in finding childcare, you could swap with friends, ask the grandparents, or simply have a lunch date which might not require child care, at all.
Motherhood is hard. Trying to balance that with working outside the home (and all the challenges that come with it) can lead to overwhelming stress. Date nights are essential to keeping the romance alive. Put each other first. Alone time with your sweetie well keep you young, happy, and excited.