Emotional abuse can happen in any relationship. Your friend, classmates, romantic partners, teachers, and even parents or children can be emotionally abusive.
It is quite easy to think that if you were ever in an abusive relationship, you would be able to tell, but believe me, emotional abuse is not always that easy to acknowledge.
Most people only think of domestic violence or physical violence as abuse, but emotional disturbance can have as damaging of an effect, if not more. Emotionally abusive people are usually manipulative, and they try to undermine your self-worth. They are possessive and continuously keep you worried about their approval.
Though emotional abuse can happen in any relation, today, we are going to talk more specifically about emotionally abusive partners, and I am going to tell you about the seven most prominent signs that can help you recognize an emotionally abusive and toxic partner.
Your partner is controlling:
Controlling and being overly possessive is one of the most common hallmarks of an emotionally abusive partner. If you feel that your partner tries to control everything you do, and make you feel ashamed and inadequate if you don’t do anything according to their liking, then they might be emotionally abusive. Here are some common signs of a toxic and controlling partner.
- They may prevent you from seeing certain friends or family members.
- They may try to stop you from doing a specific job or taking a particular class that you want to
- They continuously ask about your whereabouts and what you are doing.
- They check your phone and demand passwords to your social media accounts.
- They get very jealous when they see you with someone else, and might even accuse you of cheating.
- They try to control what you wear, eat, and even watch on social media.
- They might also withhold affection and act distant to punish you.
Your partner is mean and degrading:
Another common sign of an abusive partner is that they are verbally abusive towards you. This may be in the form of direct abuse toward you, your personality, or your appearance, or it can also be in the way of making fun of you in front of mutual friends.
Degrading their partners is another technique emotionally abusive people use to establish control. No matter how good you are, they will never acknowledge it, and they will keep you working for their approval.
Body shaming is another common form of verbal abuse, and emotionally abusive partners may always call you fat, not humiliate you in front of their friends by calling your things like worthless or stupid.
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Their anger usually accelerates to violence:
If your partner starts breaking stuff whenever an argument is accelerated, you should be careful of them. When your partner portrays this level of violence, it can be quite intimidating, especially if you care about them.
You will find yourself trying to do anything to avoid this level of anger, which means that you will be forced to compromise on things that you shouldn’t. You may find yourself doing something that you are uncomfortable with to keep your partner from getting angry.
If that is the case, your partner is abusive, even if they never actually physically hurt you, they use intimidation tactics like breaking things to make you do what they want. You should try to end such a toxic relationship. In short, if your partner gets angry in a way that makes you scared, then it is a sign of emotional abuse.
Everything is your fault, even when it is not:
Do you find yourself apologizing all the time, even when it isn’t your fault; this is another sign of a toxic and emotionally abusive relationship. Whenever you approach your partner with a concern about how he or she treats you, you end having to be the one who apologizes, instead of getting your interests heard and acknowledged.
Whenever you complain to your partner, they will twist the conversation and make you feel like the bad guy. It is a classic power play that most emotionally abusive people use to keep control over their partner.
You feel like you’re walking on eggshells:
Most emotionally abused people describe their life as living on eggshells. They are always trying to avoid making their partner angry. They have to think many times before they say something or do something. They find themselves asking their partners permission about things they shouldn’t need to, and they are always stressed around their partner.
If you feel the same, then you, too, are in a toxic relationship with an emotionally abusive partner.
Your partner continually threatens you:
Abusive people use threats and ultimatums to control their partner and put them in a powerless position. If your partner is threatening to harm you or your possessions, it is quite evident that something is wrong. Still, emotionally abusive people usually threaten their partners that they will leave them.
Such emotionally abusive partners use your love against you, and by threatening to abandon you, they put you in uncomfortable positions and make you question your self-worth. Some emotionally abusive partners also play the victim card and threaten to harm themselves if you don’t do what they say.
If you are in a relationship where you feel threatened every day, and your partner gives you constant ultimatums and says that they will break up with you, you are definitely in a toxic relationship that is destroying your self-worth.
Your partner continually undermines your opinions:
Another sign of an emotionally abusive partner is that they never acknowledge your opinions, and even if you are right about something, they will always shoot your ideas down and undermine you. They will continuously find ways to make you feel unintelligent, and they will force you to be dependent on them.
A healthy relationship I made on trust and conversation, and if your partner can’t trust your opinions and have a healthy discussion without undermining you, you need to get out. Such a toxic relation does not lead to anywhere useful.
David Martin is currently a final year student of Neuroscience at California University. He is passionate about writing and takes a keen interest in all things that alter our mental makeup. He regularly writes blogs at https://bestkratomcanada.ca/.