If you have a friend going through a divorce, here are the best tips to support them (from therapists).
1. Listen without judgment
Be patient with your friends as they work through their emotions. Let them know that you are always ready to listen to them. It may be helpful to offer activities such as:
- keeping a diary;
- meditation;
This can help them deal with their emotions in a healthy way.
It is important to remember that everyone experiences divorce differently. While it’s natural to want to help and support, try not to impose your own ideas on how your friend should behave during this time of crisis. Don’t:
- tell them when “it’s time to move on”;
- suggest ways to improve your well-being.
Such advice is not always appropriate and you may appear indifferent or judgmental at this moment. Instead, focus on being able to listen with understanding and always be ready to offer moral support when needed.
2. Offer practical help
Let your help be practical. Give your friend the opportunity to talk about his feelings, listen to him without judging or trying to fix the situation. An honest, emotional conversation can be incredibly therapeutic. Having someone to listen without judgment is so important, it can make all the difference. Suggest resources such as books, websites, or articles that have helped you in similar situations.
Try to distract your friend when he needs it. When someone file for divorce in Florida online, they are especially in dire need of some distraction from the stressful situation. Offer anything to distract them from their sad thoughts:
- dinner or drinks,
- watching a movie together;
- just sit at home in front of the TV.
Even an hour of distraction can be helpful during this difficult time in their lives.
3. Respect their decisions
Don’t take sides or judge anyone involved in the situation. Friends and family members can sometimes find it difficult to remain unbiased when a close friend’s relationship ends. But it’s important that your friend feels truly supported.
There are many different ways to support friend during divorce. Practical help can be especially useful:
- assistance in moving;
- search for legal representation, if necessary;
- providing childcare to allow the friend to be alone;
- just being available when he needs someone to talk to.
All of these actions can go a long way in showing your friend how much you care about them. It is important to let him understand that you are ready to be by his side during this difficult period of their life.
| Tips to Support a Friend Going Through a Divorce, from Therapists |
|---|
| 1. Offer a Listening Ear |
| Be a compassionate and nonjudgmental listener. Allow your friend to express their feelings and emotions without interruption or trying to offer immediate solutions. Provide a safe space for them to share their thoughts and experiences. |
| 2. Validate Their Emotions |
| Validate your friend’s emotions and let them know that their feelings are valid and understandable. Avoid minimizing or dismissing their emotions, even if you don’t fully understand or agree with their perspective. Show empathy and understanding. |
| 3. Respect Their Privacy |
| Respect your friend’s need for privacy and confidentiality. Avoid discussing their divorce or sharing sensitive information without their consent. Let them know that you are there to support them, but be mindful of their boundaries and wishes regarding confidentiality. |
| 4. Avoid Taking Sides |
| Remain neutral and avoid taking sides in any conflicts between your friend and their ex-spouse. It’s important to support your friend without getting involved in their disputes. Offer an impartial perspective and encourage open communication and understanding. |
| 5. Provide Practical Support |
| Offer practical support in tangible ways. This could include helping with childcare, running errands, providing meals, or assisting with household tasks. By easing their day-to-day responsibilities, you can alleviate some of the stress and pressure they may be experiencing. |
| 6. Suggest Professional Help |
| Encourage your friend to seek professional help, such as therapy or counseling, to support their emotional well-being during the divorce process. Offer to help them research reputable therapists or accompany them to therapy sessions if they feel comfortable. |
| 7. Be Patient and Available |
| Recognize that healing from a divorce takes time. Be patient with your friend as they navigate their emotions and adjust to their new circumstances. Let them know that you are available for support whenever they need it, even if it’s just to have a listening ear. |
| 8. Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice |
| Refrain from offering unsolicited advice or trying to “fix” their situation. Instead, focus on being a supportive presence. If they specifically ask for advice, provide it with care and sensitivity, keeping in mind that every divorce situation is unique. |
| 9. Offer Distractions and Self-Care Opportunities |
| Encourage your friend to engage in activities that provide a temporary distraction from their divorce-related stress. Suggest self-care practices such as exercise, hobbies, or outings that can help them relax, recharge, and focus on their well-being. |
| 10. Check-In Regularly |
| Keep in touch with your friend regularly to show that you care and are there for them throughout their divorce journey. Check-in via calls, messages, or in-person meetings, and inquire about their well-being. Let them know that they are not alone in this process. |
4. Encourage seeking professional help
It is important that you do not judge your partner and support him throughout the process. Ask openly how they feel and what they need from you as a supporter. Offer practical advice on how to support a friend going through a divorce. Encourage them to make positive decisions during the divorce process.
Think of and suggest 10 ways your friend can take care of themselves during this time. This can include anything from:
- yoga classes;
- meditation;
- allocating time for self-discovery;
- keeping a diary;
- drawing.
These actions can provide an outlet for raging emotions and help build resilience and emotional strength during this difficult time in your friend’s life. Encourage him to do something pleasant every day that brings joy, even something small, for example, have breakfast at his favorite cafe or get a massage after work.
5. Remind them of their value and strengths
It is important that you support their emotions and not judge them. Let them know that sometimes you need to express your feelings, even if it’s sadness or anger.
Emphasize their strengths. Sometimes, especially during emotionally stressful times, it can be difficult to realize your strength and resilience. As a friend, you can remind them of this. Make sure they know their best sides and are strong enough to get through this difficult time in their lives.
Be patient with your friends. Divorce is usually quite an emotionally exhausting process for many people. Be patient with your friend as he talks about his feelings and makes plans for the future. Offer your support as often as possible, make it clear that you will always be there if needed.
There are many ways to support a friend going through a divorce. You can quite useful things for him, for example:
- listen without judgment;
- offer practical advice;
- provide emotional reassurance during this difficult time.
6. Be patient and understanding
Showing your friend that you are open and supportive of their decision can go a long way in improving their situation at this time. By supporting you:
- let it be known that you are always there;
- listen when needed without demanding a big revelation, if they don’t want it;
- respect their boundaries and give them space to work on their feelings at their own pace;
- Offer practical support if you can;
- help with childcare or household chores;
- advise a specialist who will help with the legal aspects of divorce;
- just bring groceries or food if they don’t have the energy to cook.
If your friend feels that they have your unconditional support, it will go a long way in helping them cope with this difficult time in their life.
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