If you have trouble saying no when asked to bake one more thing, make one more stop, or join another committee, I have three ways to say no that just may work for you.
As moms, we are so accustomed to taking care of others that we can often take on too much. When you find yourself going over budget, forgetting things, and ending the day feeling like you haven’t done one thing for yourself, maybe it’s time to start saying no.
1. Let Me Check My Schedule
I have a very close friend who uses this as her go to phrase. The first time she said it, I thought it was peculiar. How dare my friend not say yes to my request? After I saw her responding this way to others’ requests and her replying that way to me in multiple instances. I thought – ok this is just her process. It gives her the opportunity to evaluate her time, money, and other resources before committing to anything. Genius.
2. We’ll See
This buys me time with my kids. I respond this way when I don’t want to commit to saying yes, but I haven’t decided to say no either. If they ask me about it again, I will more seriously consider their request. If they don’t ask again, I’ll know they really weren’t that interested.
If you are the confident, non-people pleasing type, this is easy for you. If you’re like me, this is a serious challenge. This is where mommy guilt comes in and we are afraid to put ourselves first. I am really working on this. It is an acquired habit and skill. I’ve been making a more conscious effort to evaluate what I have already committed to before taking on anything else.
What will saying no get you?
More time, money, and margin in your schedule and budget.
Is it hard for you to say no? If so, why? If not, what are your strategies?
Don’t miss the 31 Days to Make Being a Working Mom Easier series.
AWESOME….I love your wonderful tips…sooo good…
Robin @ The Golden Rule Kids says
All three are great! You are right sometimes we just have to say plain no, and it can be hard with the mommy guilt. Thanks so much for sharing!
Meredith @ The Palette Muse says
This is a HUGE challenge for me. I’m going to try the “check my schedule” thing next time. Thanks for the tips!
I use a version of the first often, “I need to check with my husband to see if he has already made plans.” And yes, sometimes I just hope the person will forget they asked me.
Found you on You’re Gonna Love It
Lol. That’s a great one Audrey! Thanks for stopping by.
Crystal Green says
I love “we’ll see” statement, and use it a lot with my kids. As far as the rest of the world, I can do it easily. I just can’t do it easily with my husband and MIL, and those are the people who really ask the most of me.
Family is definitely the hardest.
Janice Wald says
I love this. I help bloggers who need a “No Thank You” list. Am I able to reblog this? I don’t see a “reblog” choice, so I’m guessing no. Too bad. If yes, please advise. I find you Inspirational! I have to pick two most inspirational. I’m not done reading, but check back tomorrow.
Please advise on the reblog. Thanks,
Thank you for coming to the Inspire Me Monday Linky Party on Monday. I’m Janice, one of your hostesses.
Jennifer Burby says
I enjoyed this post and also have a hard time saying no, partly because of FOMO (“Fear of Missing Out”) and the other part is because I’m afraid that if I start declining, the invitations will stop coming. One of my girlfriends repeated a wise saying: when you say yes to something, you’re saying no to something else. As a full time lawyer and part time blogger, saying yes to outside commitments usually means I’m saying no to my own family. That saying has helped me to keep my true priorities in check.